Monday, May 16, 2011

Long time no write

It's rare but sometimes I feel I have nothing to say. So much has been said about everything already, spewed more like. Bin Laden? My favorite is Mark Twain's quote: "I do not celebrate anyone's death but have read a few obituaries with pleasure." I got no pleasure from any of it. It is the world off its centre. Evil and terror and people's demise. Not nice.

The Royal Wedding. Pretty and exciting in the midst of ugly.

Family. They are aging and not well. Mom turned 81 the other day. Wasn't feeling well so had to cancel dinner. And she didn't want her Kindle. Thought it would be light and bright and easy to hold and read. She has always been an avid reader. Her response: "I don't read anymore." This from a woman who taught me to read and has read 4 books a week since I've been old enough to realize how much she reads and knows. It was one of her joys. I think life is escaping her. No passion left for it. Happens. Not fun to talk or write about though. Just sad.

Relationships? Best friend is moving away. She is tthe one with the grandson I would go see on a down day and he would run out and swing up in my arms before I reached the door in excitement. I taught him to build snowmen and ride flying saucers down hills and yes, how to read. They will be gone in less than 2 weeks. It's good for her as she lost her job after 25 years and is lucky enough to have found a great new one, in Atlanta, where her daughter and grandchildren now are. But....I will soo miss her presence. No matter the adversity, she always, always looked up and has faith and a positive nature I've never witnessed in anyone in my lifetime. She inspires me....and has taught me so much.

Boyfriends? Nah. Have a new friend I am enjoying time with when we find time. Mostly I find myself wanting to be alone and having to force myself to be social. I am quiet and rather closed. Unusual for me in springtime but it is what it is and I do not pretend. No sense in it. I like who he is. I just don't feel much spirit in me in that sense right now but maybe that will change with time. I don't know why. So don't ask.

Today I received such a beautifully moving gift from Tasmania. A photo taken by a dear friend and former co-teacher of his son on the beach called Childhood's End. It's fabulous in composition and style and it moved me to tears. How I would love to see him and his family again. It's so far to Tasmania. I don't fly well anymore. Maybe one day.....Such a special friend and I have not the words to express what this gift meant to me and will for my lifetime.

I walk my dog. I relish in the brief beauty of flowering spring trees and gardens and the return the GREEN after the dark of winter. I ride, I ride, I ride. It is what heals my spirit, always.

So there it is. Too many words for nothing much to say.


  1. Aargh! Blogger hates me. I sent a long and thoughtful note here, but it got eaten. So: I've just sent emails to two addresses for you. Hopefully one will get through and you can send a reply, so then I can write in detail.

  2. Hmm. Just had a bounceback from your indigoginny address. So. It must be the other one. It's sitting correctly in my contacts, I think, so maybe you could try emailing me at

    flinthartas at yahoo dot com

    Then maybe we can sort out what's going on.